I often think of life as one tapestry or piece of cloth, expressing itself in a variety of colors and contours. Grief is one of the most vivid strands in the tapestry, one that will color every other piece of the fabric for a period of time, or the rest of your life.
Grief will visit all of us. Learning how to move with the natural energy of grief is the invitation and the opportunity for deeper wisdom. As the Nondual teacher Gangaji says: "There is nothing wrong with grief. Grief is an aspect of love. Let it be as it is. Be humbled by it. Then it is a great teacher."
Being with grief in this way is the challenge for so many who enter my office. We are saddled with ideas about grief that create unnecessary suffering. Am I supposed to feel like this? When will this be over? What stage of grief am I in? To which I might respond, respectively: Yes, because that's what you are feeling; I don't know; this is the stage that you are in.
Learning to be with the rawness of grief, without judgment, is the work. If you decide to work with me, you will be welcome exactly as you are. Your firestorm of grief is welcome here. Your complicated grief is welcome. Your hidden grief is welcome. Your "curled up in a ball sobbing with snot coming out of your nose" grief is welcome here.
I will not tell you to move on. I won't give you a certificate for "successfully going through the stages of grief." I will meet you, in our shared fragility, while you find your inner resilience.Together, we soften our resistance to grief, and learn how to move skillfully through the work of this moment.
I offer grief counseling services at my Hillsborough location. If you would like to meet for a free consultation, please call or send me an email.
"Grief holds the power to help us recognize our shared fragility and also to call forth our mutual resilience as we meet one another in sometimes unspeakable pain."